My Personal Goals for 2016 got eaten up into the abyss of the interwebz, and, honestly, I haven’t been able to bear the thought of rewriting and typing the whole thing with my still-hurt hand. But that doesn’t mean I can’t write! I’ve decided to move on to my Marital Goals post because, frankly, that’s more interesting than exercise, flossing, and regular check-ups, anyway.
Here’s what I’ve come up with. I thought long and hard about what sorts of things really help my marriage sing. I mean, our marriage is fine. We’re happy and committed and all that good stuff. But… are we regularly DELIGHTED by one another? Do we have time to just enjoy each other? Are we nurturing the communication and joy and discovery in our relationship? These things matter!
Marital Goals for 2016
1. Weekly Date Nights — reversed, whenever possible.
“Date Night” around here does not typically involve babysitters or restaurants. More often, it’s take-out after taking the older two kids to karate. I feed the kids Cheesy Beans & Rice (one of their FAVORITE meals), head out to karate, and my husband takes our youngest with him to go pick up grown-up food. I know that doesn’t sound exciting. But we look forward to it! Knowing we’ll have that time to eat together, just the two of us, and talk about and do what WE want is wonderful. Making it a “Reverse Date Night” is even better, in my opinion, because I needn’t worry that exhausted mommy will show up, yawning, and passing out before we can even spend time together.
2. Banner Year Getaway
At some point last year, I realized that during this year, 2016, my husband I would both turn 40 AND celebrate our 15th wedding anniversary. Those are all big things! I decided we should do something special and I used part of my substitute teaching income last year to fund a “getaway” column in the budget. The money is already there. What’s left is to find a fantastic little getaway that will allow us to celebrate and relish our time some place fabulous, while not being gone too long, since I’m asking my parents to watch our kiddos in our absence. (They know this already. Don’t worry– this blog post isn’t going to be their first notice! )
The two of us, after our dinner out in Boston.
3. City Visit-- perhaps an overnight?
Early in December, my husband I made a trip into Boston for a surprise party in honor of my best friend’s 40th birthday. We arrived in the city earlier than we needed to be there and decided to just walk around and explore. Honestly, the whole visit was wonderful– we had a fabulous meal in a great restaurant, lots of fun conversation, and it was so great to celebrate with the woman who’s been my friend for 30 years! During the drive home, I recalled how nice it had been and remarked, “I even loved when we just walked around the city, holding hands, when we were early.” My husband smiled at me and said, quietly, “That was my favorite part.”
It was a really special time together! We had a blast walking the city blocks, checking out the holiday decorations, and just exploring together. We had tons of opportunities to meander through woods and mountains here, but, city streets? Not so much. We want to do it again. And, honestly? We’ve got quite a few major cities in easy proximity.
This set of goals makes me smile. These are all wonderfully fun things to look forward to, but they’re also important. We’ve learned that investing in time and travel together is important to us. We care more about visiting places than redecorating. I’d rather go on a getaway than get a new stove!