“My Story… ” Monday: My Journey with the Pill– Learning

(Over the next few weeks, I will be sharing some very personal stories.  There will be ignorance, learning, and hard choices addressed along the way.  If you have different views from mine– on either end of the spectrum– I am totally comfortable with that.  I do ask that we show one another kindness and always remember that each woman’s journey is different…)

 

I took those pills, just as they’d been prescribed, and, in doing so, I learned a lot of things…

 

::I learned that my body could adjust to the hormones.  After a shaky first week where I felt like an emotional wreck, it all evened out and I felt fine again.

 

::I learned that something as simple as taking a tiny pill really could be almost a miracle cure in terms of my cysts.  I had not a single issue once I went on what was, essentially, hormone therapy.  All that pain?  Gone.

 

::I learned that I can be very vigilant about taking things just as prescribed.  I have a sort of internal alarm clock that truly had me reaching for those pills every day within a five minute window.  I am such a routine-craving creature.

 

::I learned that I can feel strong and healthy and happy even when not on the exact course I would have chosen for myself.  This was humbling, to be truthful.

 

::Perhaps most importantly of all, I learned that God is bigger than pills.

 

And, here, my friends, is where I had so hoped to tell you that we were expecting our fourth baby.  Devastatingly, we learned, long before this date, that our littlest one had been called to heaven.  Because I know some of you are wondering (and because I pray you’d have the grace not to mention it), I will share that this loss was not in any way connected with my being on the Pill.  The Pill can affect the uterine lining and interfere with implantation.  This was not what went wrong in my case.  In the case of our precious baby, an enlarged yolk sac indicated chromosomal abnormalities– the most common cause of all miscarriages.

 

How sad I am that I was so very excited to have such a dramatic lead-up to such a wonderful announcement… only to have to share heart-breaking news instead.

 

Nonetheless, beyond a shadow of a doubt, God IS bigger than pills.  And, through Him, all things are possible.

 

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