Preparing Myself to Honor My Husband

 

I could spend all day making sure my house is a welcoming haven.  I could make sure all the details are in place for a great at-home date.  I could have his favorite meal simmering away upon his arrival home.  All of it counts for nothing if my heart isn’t prepared for him.

 

Far and away, the most important way I honor my husband is displayed in how I prepare and present, not my house, but myself.  Here are a few of my thoughts on how I can do a better job making sure my mind and heart are where they need to be as I set off trying to be the best wife I can be…

 

Getting Dolled Up

 

My husband dons a shirt and tie every day to show professionalism and inspire respect as he goes about his job.  While there is absolutely no need for me to be wearing fancy dresses or suits as I set about this SAHM gig, what am I saying when I don’t spend even a moment on my dress and presentation?  What message does it give the people I love most if the best I can muster is pajama pants and an old t-shirt?  While those choices aren’t the end of the world, and they may happen occasionally (particularly during illness or just after birth or such occasions), I remain convinced that there are better options.  Black boot-cut knit pants or some great-fitting jeans are comfy and practical.  A clean knit top in a pretty color is just as simple as an old tee.  My guy may or may not even notice that change… but I FEEL it.  And that affects how I act and how I treat him.

 

Taking Care of Myself

 

It is critical that I take care of myself if I want to be able to meet the needs of others.  When I’m out-of-shape, I feel lousy and all I want to do is retreat within myself.  Feeling healthy and strong gives me energy and confidence… two things that are true blessings to the man I married.  I need to eat healthy- and adequate- food.  Despite how difficult it can be, I need to schedule those doctors’ appointments to ensure my health is in good stead.  If I’m going to be prepared to take great care of my family, I need to have taken, at the very least, moderately good care of myself.  As wives and mothers, this is an area where many of us consistently fail.

 

Being a Soft Place to Fall

 

My husband is in charge at his place of work.  I expect him to also be in charge in our home.  This is very demanding and, while he’s a strong, capable man, he may occasionally need to crash or tumble down from that high place.  If and when he does?  I need to be his soft place to fall.  Rather than feel as though he’s being met with disappointment, disgust, and lack of respect, he needs to feel the comfort and encouragement that only I, in my critical role of “wife”, can provide.  No matter what happens in his day- if he wrecks his car, loses his job, and forgets to pick up milk- it is up to me to be the unwavering support he can always count on.

 

A Sure Thing… or, at least, close

 

Finally, when it comes to preparing my heart and mind for my husband, it’s important that I consider what makes him feel most loved and honored.  And, really, at the end of the day, he wants a sure thing.  He wants to be able to count on me.  To lean on me.  To trust me.  And to share intimacies, both verbal and (of course) physical, with me.  While he doesn’t mind putting in some leg-work and laying some groundwork, for the most part, he shouldn’t have to worry about being shunned or denied.

 

I spend an awfully large portion of my day as “Mommy”;  it can be too easy to forget to honor the man who gave me that role… to honor the man they call Daddy.

 


Don’t forget to hop around and glean from the wisdom of my partners in this series:

Amy, Jessica, Mandi, and Tara

 

 

What steps can you take to make sure your heart and mind are prepared for your man?

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13 comments to Preparing Myself to Honor My Husband

  • I, too, have learned that shopping for comfortable AND attractive clothing has made it easier for me to look nice for my husband after a day at home with the kids. If it’s not comfy, I won’t wear it for long. I love pretty graphic T’s with flowers and yoga pants or other comfy but somewhat form-fitting pants to wear around the house. And pjs that are comfy and sexy at the same time are always a great purchase. That way I can look nice and inviting in bed and still sleep comfortably. I’ve also made sure to collect pretty pieces of intimate apparel to wear on date nights. My husband loves it that I dress modestly in public and save “special” clothes to wear just for him.

    I don’t do the best job of taking care of myself. That is the part I really need to work on. I’m careful about my eating habits, but not so good at exercising and doctor’s appointments.

    • Oh, I love tees like that too! Have you ever checked out Wild Olive Tees ? Beautiful things. You are so not alone… I think taking care of ourselves so often gets pushed way back on the list. I let getting a tooth checked out go on and on. And now? I have a root canal this afternoon. Boo. :( I need to remember that it’s not about ME. I need to do these things so I can be there for my family!

  • I am so guilty of this! I will make sure that I look “nice” to go the pediatricians office with the kids but I don’t always make the same effort for my hubby when I have been home all day being Mommy.
    Thanks for the reminder!

  • [...] honors her husband by taking good care of herself. It is critical that I take care of myself if I want to be able to meet the needs of others.  When [...]

  • [...] Your Husband is all about YOU Isn’t that just such a powerful thing to know?  How YOU prepare and present yourself to your man is the biggest key of all when it comes to honoring… While I KNOW this, it still never fails to amaze [...]

  • Sarah A

    Just found this series and I love it! Thanks so much for the encouragement and advice! I am a new mommy and need to remember to honor the man who made me one – by knowing HIM and being the best wife for him. :-) I love the “know your man” theme throughout this. So helpful.

  • Ladies, I agree with you all. I agree so much that I started a blog called, I will honor my husband. Please feel free to join in the movement of honoring your husband for the year of 2011 at http://www.iwillhonormyhusband.com. Be sure to spread the word to help keep all our marriages happy and alive.

    Rochelle

  • urs

    I love both sites. How can you learn to honor AGAIN after you’ve been hurt by him? We are in the beginning stages of our healing process. I want my marriage but I don’t wont to be hurt by him again. I know revenge isn’t mine. I can honor him instead… God help me! It sure is easier said.

    • Urs, I truly believe that the best way to heal our hurt wounds is to first demonstrate that we can forgive first ourselves and then others. I have been learning a great lesson this year while keeping my commitment to God and honoring my husband. That lesson has been, I cannot honor God if I do not honor my husband first. I wish you many blessings, peace of heart and grace as you work through your hurt. You are correct it is much easier said than done however it can be done with God.

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